January Books

The books I have finished reading in January 2020 are:
The Art of Growing Up by John Marsden
Harry Potter and the Cursed Child by JK Rowling
The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle
The Gifts of Imperfections by Brene Brown

Some of the notes I took from these books are:

The Art of Growing Up by John Marsden

• We are all product of the past, product of our parent's parenting style. Parents should be aware of the unhealthy ways they construct childhood and adolescence, and the dangers these bring, parents need to rethink about their prejudices and expectation to their children
• Loving the world is easy but loving the person next door that's difficult, we often talk big dream big but we failed to do it on the smaller scales daily. In short, hypocrites are everywhere, me too
• Parenting advice

1. Accept that, as children grow, the style of parenting must evolve from the "I'll do everything you need' approach which is mandatory in the first months of life. Gradually, and sometimes rapidly, parents must step back further and further
2. Converse with children in a way which will encourage them to develop sophisticated language skills. it is essential that these skills include the ability to communicate feelings
3. Have kids to do regular jobs from an early age. the tasks should benefit others, not be unduly easy, and be completed to a high standard
4. Help children develop a range of strategies for problem-solving. They need to recognise that every problem has many possible solutions
5. Let kids be bored
6. Be completely indifferent when kids get muddy
7. Encourage kids to embrace all kinds of weather

• Children nowadays lead such limited and boring lives, the first-hand experiences are rare, they gained knowledge from books, the internet, school. That's why they craving for drama and tend to create unnecessary drama in their lives
• Be an interesting conversationalist, we have to face that we are boring in some way. We don't need to communicate our thoughts immediately the moments they pop into our head. We need to be aware that not every detail of our lives is of absorbing interest to everyone, therefore, we need to learn how to limit the number of "I" statements we make each day
• Some tips to win people from Dale Carnegie are: 

1. Be genuinely interested in other people
2. Smile
3. Remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language
4. All focused on the other person
5. Make people feel important and do it sincerely
6. focus on being interested mot interesting

• Inside out is a process - a continuing process of renewal based on the natural laws that govern human growth and progress. It's an upward spiral of growth that leads to progressively higher forms of responsible independence and effective independence. the inside out approach says that private victories precede public victories, that making and keeping promises to ourselves precedes making and keeping promises to others. it is futile to put personality ahead of character, to try to improve the relationship with others before improving ourselves. 
• If we want to have more freedom, more latitude in our job, be a more responsible, more helpful, more contributing employee. If we want to be trusted, be trustworthy. if we want to be recognised for our talents, focus first on primary greatness of character.

Harry Potter and the Cursed Child by JK Rowling

This is quite light and entertaining, we learn some of parent and children dynamic from the book. The plot and the conversation between the characters are quite amusing, as expected from JK Rowling

The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle

This book very enlightening, at the beginning I feel the ideas have been repeated multiple times but the later chapters were very eye-opening. I took a lot of notes from this book and it might be too long if I put it now on here.

The Gifts of Imperfections by Brene Brown

• The wholehearted journey is not the path of least resistance, its a path of consciousness and choice, connected in this disconnected world
• The concept of love: we cultivate love when we allow our most vulnerable and powerful selves to be deeply seen and known, and when we honor the spiritual connection that grows from that offering with trust, respect, kindness, and affection. Love is not something we give or get, it is something that we nurture and grow, a connection that can only be cultivated between two people when it exists within each of them - we can only love others as much as we love ourselves. shame blame disrespects, betrayal, and the withholding of affection damage the roots from which love grows. Love can only survive these injuries if they are acknowledged, healed, and rare.
• The concept of belonging is the innate human desire to be part of something larger than us. because this yearning is so primal, we often try to acquire it by fitting in and by seeking approval, which is not only hollow substitutes for belonging but often barriers to it. true belonging only happens when we present our authentic, imperfect selves to the world, our sense of belonging can never be greater than our level of self-acceptance
• Shame resilience is that the less we talk about shame, the more we have it. Shame needs 3 things to grow out of control in our lives: secrecy, silence, and judgement. If shaming happens and we keep it locked up, it festers and grows, it will consume us. We need to share our shame because it heals that way 
•  It is essential to practice authenticity and embracing imperfections